air

So it has dawnded on to me, life aint what it was cut out for me to be
nothing glamorious, just growin older,
too much pain over my shoulder
the days are lonley and the nights are colder.
I dream about my happy days I yern for them, I’m a figter, a trained soilder.

To keep the moral up, I have to be positive, happy and strong
I’m not sure about it, I look at my watch, I dont know how much I can’t this any long
It’s just easy to do whats right, but never easy to do right for whats wrong
I once heard this song, it made me cry…I wanted to spread my wings and fly
I wanted to go to a better place, maybe heaven, maybe near it…I’ll seatlle for anything
what ever god can bring, I can take it, I can stand the wind

Life Laundry.

Life is complicated, painful and testy; looking around it’s just full of distortion

I wanted to kill the baby, I wished she had an abortion

This episode of life is full of commotion, this is just a notion I want to move away far from all the

Motion

Happiness to me seeming to only be a notion

Still and peaceful

I feel busted and unwanted, weak, lonely and broken hearted

My life is messed up, everyone acts so retarded

I want to have it all, shove it up your ass and show you how lucky I am a rewarded

Killing for no reason, shooting up for treason, this is the cold season

It’s 20 below freezing, my heart is busted up and bleeding, there’s so much I’m going to be needing, I’ll send you a great pink lovely greeting

I will never let you hurt my mother of let her be weeping, no one around me be creeping

My revenge will destroy your life all around you leaping

Reaping and heaping

This the beginning you ugly short fucked up beeping

I don’t understand why people lie, sell their loyalty and stab you right in the back

Hearts are cold, eye’s are blind, bodies full of crack

Do you got my back? Or should I stuff you in a sack, watch you suffocate and hack

The world is majestic and black, cold, hard, merciless hurry run down the track

I got nothing to pack

My pride is strong, I never did anything wrong

The journey of discovery is really long

Everything I ever wanted, everything I loved, cherished is all gone

unhappi

It would be hard to walk away, it’s something I had to do even when I didn’t want to
I never forgot about you

Life threw me aside, stomped on me I don’t know why
This never seemed to get better, I think I should pray more, be more censer and clever.

I want to run from my pain and start again, start over, maybe then I’ll be happy, and I can recover
I know I always keep everything inside, build up, I’m just not yappy
I feel hurt, alone and frustrated, I feel scared, angry and just exasperated.

I sit here and wonder if this is all life has to offer. I made plans but they don’t seem to work.
Most of the time I dream or better days, other days I just feel like a jerk.

what can break you from the cycle and give you hope, fill you with dreams, love and passion, compassion, empathy, sympathy, glory and pride,  morals,values and conquer all you can stride.

I want to believe, I want to work. I don’t know what to do with all the bricks on my shoulder. All the baggage I’ve been carrying seems to hold me down. I’m not ready to forgive, No ready to forget, no ready to smile, not ready to laugh, no ready to take, and instead crack

There is so much I lack
I dont trust those around me I feel like they are all wack, full of jack. I always feel like I’m on the attack
Can someone appretiate me and present me with a plank

lone.

Your never familiar with a feeling until you feel it, digging into you with a sharp axe. Blistering your arteries, and puncturing your organs. The feeling of loneliness, not the one where you feel alone, but the one you feel hopeless of being alone, unloved and paining away though the scraps of life trying to mend yourself to enable your survival of the dry heat of it all. An over whelming feeling of sorrow, of blank stare. you feel no need, no reason you get up, to talk to think to walk or to love only because love is the pain stabbing effect of emotion.

You can’t escape, you’re like a excaged hostage, willing though your boned body unable to adapt, unable to nurtion the leftovers of your self. It’s a sad image to see, a more sad piece to hear gingling in your ear like a rining ciren warning you of the black undershadow of it. Your hands, legs num too much to move, not strong enough to find the will to survive. I am a soul on the earth, alone and cold. They ran out of cotten warmth, no more, no more.